YOU WENT TO CLEVELAND BY YOURSELF ?!?!?!?!!?

Tuesday 18th September 2012 - 02.38am

Saturday morning approximately 7.15am, following a time-consuming, sleepless night at Clazel, holds my prompt arrival at the Greyhound Bus depo. To my surprise, the entrance is condoned off and the shelter appears empty but for a few miscellaneous  arachnids. Logically, I explore my surroundings and grab coffee, breakfast and pull up a pew outside the station. In this time, I am propositioned by a seedy looking African American man, accosted by a dumpster-diving bum and glared at malevolently by an old, toothless hag. All of this time carefully considering my weapon of choice, should one of my potential opponents attack: a skinny white chocolate latte purchased from the trusty gas station. This was a foreboding insight into my weekend to come.

My poor attempt at photograph. In my defence I was on a moving bus!

Before I tell you anything more I will express the naming of Family Guy's Cleveland was not a co-incidence as it is highly accurate regarding race and build of most of Cleveland's inhabitance. After a careless 2 hour drive, we arrive in Cleveland at around 10am. Time to explore - walking and observing my surroundings for nearly 3 hours I have seen the Arcade, a war memorial, the football stadium, Terminal Tower, the Flats and various other tall intimidating buildings. As check in is not until 4pm, I am still carrying a rucksack, a laptop bag and a handbag so looking like the wandering Vagabond that I am, I briefly observed much of Cleveland from the outside.  I decide to reward myself with a trip to the cinema to see Possession.  

After having bespectacled all of these wonderful skyscrapers I sat down to eat once more at another Hard Rock Cafe, on my own this time which was pretty lonesome. And with a belly full of burger I ventured to my hotel room to get a good night's kip and my money's worth of free view. However, this proved more difficult than I anticipated as every person I asked indicated a different direction for me to go in. After a pointless expedition on the public transport machine (it looked like both a tram and a bus) I finally located my room and put my tired self to bed. The next morning welcomed me with sunny skies and a complimentary continental breakfast. Fully fuelled and ready to rumble, I wondered off into Downtown Cleveland and hoped onto a boat that was happily resting in the harbour. Unfortunately, by this time both phones and my laptop had run out of battery meaning I couldn't capture the pretty views starboard bough. Nevertheless, I devoured a mass quantity of buffet food whilst being ferried along the Lake Eerie. Once my delightful little sail was over, I ascended Terminal Tower, the second highest building in Cleveland. The view was actually really spectacular making me realise how aesthetically pleasing this city was.

Until I noticed a great massive bird or 3 beneath me. They resembled turkeys but had no enormous tail or funny dangly thing around its bill. This is when I realised it was a vulture and I was creeped out so descended Terminal Tower, just in time to go shopping before I caught the last bus home.